Wednesday 23 March 2016

I love the internet and how it assists in parenting.

Recently I posted on the topic of parental frustration and how to wake a very tall and grouchy child without being injured.  It was a request for suggestions as I'd tried everything I knew on how to manage the situation with grace and panache.


And it worked, so far so good.


The very tall and grumpy child was sat down at Family Home Evening.  That night, instead of games and cookies, it was a frank and forthright chat, kind of like Family Inventory. 


It went something along the lines of
"The waking up is going to happen, it's a requirement and a repeat of this morning can never happen again.  However, you do get a say in how you are woken because what we are doing right now is not working for either of us.  What would work for you? What suggestions do you have?  Would you prefer to be called and left for a couple of minutes to gather yourself?  Would you prefer to have the light switched on?  Would you want cheerful music switched on to start you waking up?  You get to think about this for a while and if you have any other suggestions feel free to add them."


Tuesday was fine because the class they attend (Seminary) is held in the evenings on that night to fit in with their youth club afterward.  But then along came the evening and I had to gulp, bite the bullet and approach the subject again.  I was internally pensive.  The child accepted the chat gracefully and just said they'd take themselves to bed a little earlier to try and get a couple of hours in (insomnia is a right kick in the pants), and then did just that.  I was shocked.


Wednesday morning came and all went smoothly, my oh-no-not-again sinking feeling started when the child complained for a moment, but then they stopped themselves. They rested for a couple of minutes and then got up when asked the second time. It was such a relief and I am grateful and happy that for the time being they appear to have taken the counsel on board and tried it out. 


I don't like contention because I am so good at it!  Best avoided at all costs if I'm going to lead the way to a harmonious home.  I am trying my best to be an available and approachable parent, who sets boundaries, is consistent and provides a safe and loving home.  Some days I'm just winging it and occasionally I put the problem out their for those who have been down this road before to offer their advice and counsel - I never ask if I am not ready to listen.  I am glad I took the bite of humble pie to admit there was a problem, and I am grateful to the beautiful women who offered some "you're doing great, hang in there" and "here's what worked for us" input. 


Thank you, Seesters!*




(Seesters is a heartfelt term of endearment I picked up at the Missionary Training Centre in Provo, Utah, from the most inspirational woman in the building, Sister Mary Ellen Edmunds, who is an author too, her books are available on Amazon http://www.amazon.co.uk/Mary-Ellen-Edmunds/e/B001JP4EKC/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1458745521&sr=8-1)











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